Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Roadmaps for our journeys

"What this power is I cannot say; all I know is that it exists and
it becomes available only when a man is in that state of mind in
which he knows exactly what he wants and is fully determined not to
quit until he finds it."
-- Alexander Graham Bell
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Okay... I know. It's been forever since I wrote my last article. I am back in the saddle and will start posting at least once a week from now on. (I was recently at an intense workshop with Stephanie Frank -- www.TheAccidentalMillionaire.com and am working through all I learned to make sure that I schedule more time for the important and not just the urgent.

So, it's summer vacation time. If you're like my gang, with the logistics of 6 kids and all that
comes with them, you are likely long past the freespirited younger days when you could
take off accross the country with a bathing suit, two pairs of shorts, some deodorant, toothbrush and a wallet - not even knowing or caring where you are going. Nope... for most of us, vacations take some planning - sometimes, a lot of it!

In reflecting on our family vacations, I had some thoughts about the Life journey that
we all find ourselves on.

* A Roadmap for Your Life
-Thom Scott, Managing Partner, Burg-Scott Communications, Inc.

It may have taken me the first 40 years of my life to really
embrace, but "success" is more than economic gains, titles, and
degrees. To me, real success is about reaching the destination that
you have chosen... the one that you have been uniquely created for
- AND enjoying the journey along the way. As with any journey, in
order to successfully reach your destination, you will need to
create a personal plan (or roadmap) - just like most of us do for
our own family vacations - that defines the following details:
starting point, destination, vehicle, luggage, landmarks, and route.

Starting Point: Who you are

You can't get where you want to go, without knowing where you are.
The starting point on your Roadmap For Life is who you are right
now. Most people when asked to introduce themselves would say, "Hi,
I'm John. I'm an electrician," or some such similar statement. That
does not tell you about who John is; it only tells you his present
occupation. To gain insights about yourself, you need to look
closely at your beliefs, values, and principles aside from your
economic, professional, cultural, and civil status. Moreover, you
can also reflect on your experiences to give you insights on your
good AND not-so-good traits, skills, knowledge, strengths, and
weaknesses. Upon introspection, John may realize that he is highly
motivated, generous, service-oriented, but impatient. His
inclination is in making things work correctly. Furthermore, he
believes that life must serve a purpose.

Note: If you are like many who have a hard time identifying their
strengths, try finding them in your weaknesses/challenges.
Oftentimes, a weakness is a strength that's being used the wrong
way, or for the wrong reasons. For instance, a parent who easily
slips into scolding and yelling often possesses the seeds of great
leadership. They are decisive and goal-oriented. The skills just
need to be developed. Someone who struggles with shyness is often
very good at cultivating deep, quality relationships versus a
plethora of acquaintances. You get the idea.

Destination: A vision of who you want to be

One of the amazing things about the way we humans are created is
that we don't have to settle for who or where we are in life. We
can become who and what we desire. So,who do want to be? What do
you want to spend your time doing? What do you want to have? Who do
you want to help? this is your vision. Knowing yourself (where your
starting point is) will help you develop a clearer idea of who you
want to be; and the things you want to change whether they are
attitudes, habits, or points of view. If you hardly know yourself,
then your vision and targets for the future will also be unclear.
Your destination should cover all the aspects of your being: the
physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual. Continuing John,
after he defines his beliefs, values, and principles in life, he
may decide that he wants to have a life dedicated to creating a
legacy for his children.

Vehicle: Your Mission

A vehicle is the means by which you can reach your destination. It
can be analogized to your mission in life. Your mission is a
natural extension of your vision for your life. For instance, we
see that John has decided that he wants to have a life dedicated to
creating a legacy for his children. He may choose to accomplish
this by raising them to be responsible members of society,
developing a business that is a financial asset long after he is
gone and by being a consistent example of a great husband and
father as well as a "servant leader" of others.

Luggage (not to be confused with baggage): Your knowledge, skills,
and attitudes

Clothing, food, drinks, medicines, and other travelling necessities
are often packed for physical trips that we embark upon. Applying
this concept to the Roadmap For Your Life, you also bring with you
certain knowledge, skills, and attitudes. These determine your
competence and help you in attaining your vision. Given such, there
is a need for you to assess what knowledge, skills, and attitudes
you have at present and what you need to gain along the way. This
two-fold assessment will give you insights on your landmarks or
measures of success. John may have realized that he needed to gain
professional knowledge and skills to transform his current
self-employed situation (most often trading time for dollars) into
a true walk-away business that can be an asset for his kids. He may
have also determined that he needed to learn better coaching and
persuasion skills in order to have greater influence in his kids'
lives.

Landmarks and Routes: Breaking your trip down into sections.

Living in Central Florida, if I want to travel to Georgia, I can
get in my car and power on through without stopping in order to
arrive at my destination within a few hours. However, if I'm going
to drive to Los Angeles, I will need to break my trip down into
manageable daily sections. Landmarks (sub-goals) confirm if you are
on the right track and if your pace will be able to deliver you to
your destination in the period of time that you desire. Your routes
are the specific tasks that you perform every day that are either
moving you closer to your landmarks and destination, or further
away. Thus, in planning out the Roadmap For Your Life, you will
also need to have landmarks and a route.

Your landmarks (subgoals) must be specific, measurable, attainable,
realistic, and time bound. I cannot realistically drive to Los
Angeles in 30 straight hours. At just over 2,500 miles, it will
take 36 hours in driving time alone, not including pit stops and
sleep. Likewise, it may not be realistic to set a landmark of
earning a master's degree and a doctorate degree within a period of
three years, since the standard number of years to complete a
master's degree is two years.

There are many different routes which can be chosen to reach any
given destination. The key is to choose routes that fit your
lifestyle and personality so that you can truly enjoy the journey
rather than "gritting your teeth" and being miserable till you
finally get to where you want to be.

Anticipate Turns, Detours, and Potholes

This one is very difficult for me and may seem counterintuitive for
those of us who try to think positively. It is important that you
"expect the best, but plan for the worst." I've learned, with much
trial and error and self-inflicted pain, that despite all my plans
and route mapping, detours, delays and potholes happen. I can
either fight them (and wind up in a ditch at the side of the road
that I want to take), or I can follow the detour signs - as long as
I see that I'm still progessing on the journey to my destiny.

In the Bible, Proverbs 16:9 tells us, "In his heart, a man plans
his way [read "route"], but the Lord determines his steps." Of
course, we often want the quickest, most direct route to our
destination. But, more often than not, our route will be more
circuitous and bring us on some detours that we would rather not
take. In those moments, we can choose to be grateful for the route
that is there and examine the sights and learn from the experiences
that come with the perceived inconveniences. Or, we can curse the
road and all the drivers around us, slam on the brakes, or attempt
to drive past guard rails and warning signs to get to the road that
we believe (often falsely) is best for us. Peace and progress or
strife and struggling ... the choice is ours.

There is no right or wrong in creating the Roadmap For Your Life -
as long as it is all based on the real desires and uniqueness that
you were created with. The important thing is that you actually
create one - so that you can know, every day, that you are living a
life on purpose and always growing and moving towards your chosen
destination. Having a Roadmap for Your Life will ensure that your
daily choices (route selections) are heading in the right
direction. With greater clarity than you've ever had, you will
eliminate the hasty and spur-of-the-moment default decisions that
cause others to lose their way. You will confidently know that you
will arrive at your destination and you will be truly free to enjoy
the journey along the way.